In Care of Thee 1/15

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Side story! This opening scene takes place several months before the Rally to Restore Humanity, and will look familiar to anyone who’s seen episode 10 of the Hellsing TV anime. (If you haven’t, please track it down, because it’s beautiful.) The title is from The Tempest: “I have done nothing but in care of thee… Continue reading In Care of Thee 1/15

In Care Of Thee 2/15

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[mwah!] Miranda: Da-dy! I told you, no more kissing until you dispense with that abominable fuzz! [Phineas and Ferb theme song] TV: Agent P! The evil Doctor Doofenshmirtz is up to his old tricks! For reasons unknown to us, he’s bought up eighty percent of the country’s tin foil! Miranda: Doctor Doofenshmirtz is the worst… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 2/15

In Care Of Thee 3/15

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Flashing back to fourteen months earlier. That’s Ann Warbucks, owner of the laboratory in which Stephen’s powers were sealed. Spring, 2009 Jon: You wanted to see me, Ms. Warbucks? Though I can’t imagine why… Ann: Mr. Stewart! Come on in and sit a spell. That’s just an expression, don’t worry. Jon: Aren’t you a little… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 3/15

In Care Of Thee 4/15

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Ann: We appreciate Mr. Colbert’s support of free-market principles in general, and our organization in particular. The Daily Show, of course, has been somewhat more critical. I believe the catchphrase is “military-industrial handjobs.” Jon: Well, you know, I don’t watch that show. I think it’s crass. Ann: I’m not complaining. In fact, I figure we… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 4/15

In Care Of Thee 5/15

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How much do I love that the Olberclone Farm is canon? Ann: We didn’t create Olbermann, but he’s turned out to be surprisingly useful. Nobody here is adept at playing the media game. His influence makes it that much easier. Of course, if we had somebody with your critical insight working for us… Jon: You… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 5/15

In Care Of Thee 6/16

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Ann Warbucks has a slightly skewed idea about the prevalence of rich, ethical adults who are willing and eager to take in an orphan at the drop of a hat. With Jon, however, she got lucky. Ann: They’re not literal clones, but in spirit, they’re being trained… Jon: This is diabolical! Genius, but diabolical! Ann:… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 6/16

In Care Of Thee 7/15

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2010. Miranda “Mandy” Lake Stewart. [cheep cheep] Miranda: Lean forward. Jon: Honey, you’re going to make me fall over. [cheep cheep] Jon: Mandy, there’s something important I want to tell you. But it’s a big secret, so you can’t talk about it with anyone. Not even to win a debate. Do you think you can… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 7/15

In Care Of Thee 8/15

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To be fair, this hypothesis is much more likely than the truth. Jon: You know I love you more than anyone else in the world, right? Miranda: Even more than the Mets! Jon: Oh, a lot more than the Mets. So this secret might be a little scary, but I don’t want you to worry… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 8/15

In Care of Thee 9/15

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Back in the past, Jon and Stephen have a heart-to-heart. Or rather, a heart-to-gut. 2009. Jon: Of course, this is a big decision, and not something I can just jump into… Stephen: Don’t do it. Jon, this adoption is a terrible idea! How can you even consider it? Think about your responsibilities! Jon: You know,… Continue reading In Care of Thee 9/15

In Care Of Thee 10/16

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Faaaaaan~service! Stephen: The seals that hold my powers in check are bound to your family. Right now, you’re the only one holding the other end of the leash. But if you have a kid? And that kid is an Olberclone? They could order me to say bad things about Papa Bear! I would be forced… Continue reading In Care Of Thee 10/16