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But What If She Weighs Less Than A Duck? 40/111

But What If She Weighs Less Than A Duck? 40/111 published on 2 Comments on But What If She Weighs Less Than A Duck? 40/111

Michael: It looks like Iscariot is going after someone at Lillian Girls’ School. Hang on while I hack the school computer system…

While Michael does that…

…let’s check on Timothy’s about-to-be moral dilemma.

Shoulder devil: You should — you should —

— look in Heinkel’s suitcase to see what kind of underwear there is!

Shoulder angel: Too late! He’s asleep again.


Chaos Priest on Sun Dec 16, 2007 9:32 pm

Awww… Little Devil Timothy is just so adorable! Not exactly great at his job, but he’s got adorable down well.

Abadon XXX on Sun Dec 16, 2007 10:29 pm

Devil Tim is quite ebil ^.^

Urahara on Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:38 am

Bravo, Shoulderdevil Tim! Amazing idea! I’m amazed I didn’t think of that!

Now, if only you had suggested that wonderful idea when Timothy was still awake.

Reaver225 on Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:43 am

Are there such a thing as unisex pants?

If they are, Heinekel’s wearing them.

Tommygunner70 on Mon Dec 17, 2007 7:40 am

And look at timothy snoozing away like that.

for a guy, he looks cute like that :p
i just dont want to think what he look like in the morning before he has had a cup of coffee XD

Atticus_blackwolf on Mon Dec 17, 2007 9:29 am

Yayyy Pinata card made it! Excellent Sunday strip!……….I also never thought of looking in the suitcase.

FelinaofL2 on Mon Dec 17, 2007 5:42 pm

Erin is dead on about that scene. XD It’s even better with the follow up call.

Alucard: “I completed my mission, Master. I know what Millenium’s plans are. Also, that card user was a interesting opponent.”

Integra: “Good, now come home. The Queen is calling a meeting.”

Alucard: “Roger. Oh, remember when you screamed at me and aroused my passion? Did you enjoy watching me beat the crap outta everyone with my powers? I know you dii~d…” 😉

Integra: 😳 “Shut up and get back home!”

And no one EVER suspects the suitcase. ShoulderDevil!Timmy is very wise…

Frey on Mon Dec 17, 2007 8:20 pm

I enjoy conscience and tempation jokes. One of my favorites at this link:

Arvanna on Tue Dec 18, 2007 1:45 pm

Timothy’s shoulder devil is so in the *Diet Coke* category of evil it’s hysterical 😈

Atticus_blackwolf on Tue Dec 18, 2007 4:16 pm

Only one calorie but not evil enough. XD

Crasical on Tue Dec 18, 2007 5:38 pm

*cough* Hellsing characters seem to enjoy informing others about their hard ons.

Yes, but is that an acceptable order? What is the Hellsing Organization’s mission?

A. Hunt vampires, at any cost. Search and Destroy!

Given the “at any cost” part, wouldn’t bother hiding. Just take a video camera on a raid, then air it on TV. Issue “Vampires: A spotter’s guide” booklets on street corners. The measure of secrecy indicates that they aren’t willing to involve civilians or even many other orders of the government. “You sent in your own men first? Well, that’s your fuckup, not mine. Oh, and your entire squad is dead by now.” So, S&D at any cost can’t be the Hellsing Org.’s mission.

B. Hunt vampires, because it is God’s mandate.

More Iscariot than Hellsing. They’re definitely a religious and patriotic aspect to it, but I don’t believe that that this part explains why they keep civilians in the dark.

C. Protect the innocents of the world from vampires.

This twangs with the religions mandate, Vampires are monsters because God and Bram Stoker said so. Good enough. But they prey on innocent humans, which is why they are regarded as so evil, the sympathy of viewing them as a predatory species fostered by some recent media aside. (on a side note of that: They’re a *sentient* predatory species. It’s different.) Fight vampires because they’re monsters who hunt humans. Sound good. Did they forget they’re supposed to be protecting the average folk? Zealotry is increasing tenfold one’s efforts while losing sight of one’s goal. Millennium is the source of the freak vampires, so it’s definitely in best interests of their mission if they go for the throat, but accepting that level of collateral damage that redcoat is going to cause somewhat smarts that no alternative was found. Redcoat doesn’t even try to lure Dandy away from the crowd, or to bother holding his fire until he had a certain shot. Precision, thy name is NOT Alucard, and we know this. But shouting for the “miserable humans” to run their asses off before the sewage processing facility hit the jet turbine wouldn’t have taken more than a second, would it?

SailorPtah wrote:
In the face of an enemy like Millennium, that’s the only path to take.

Fully acceptable. No deals with terrorists. But this has reached the spetsnaz
level, where rescuing the hostages becomes second priority to executing the terrorists, or in this case, protecting innocent bystanders becomes a secondary concern to defeating vampires.

SailorPtah wrote:
Integra: “Walter, get me a cigar.”

. . . . .
Although at the rate she goes through those, she’s going to get lung cancer and die without leaving an heir to the hellsing organization and so this discourse on their behavior will be a moot point.

Ah, there we go. Hmm, I’ve written a good deal more than intended. Ah well, your comments, intellectual, critical, or otherwise, are all appreciated equally. *fancy bow*

Arvanna on Tue Dec 18, 2007 7:29 pm

The whole using the local police was a test by Millennium to see if they could use human tools against Hellsing? If Integra had backed down then she’d be denying the use of her most potent assets every time the enemy found a pack of morons wiling to work for them with the empty promise of making them immortal. Was it a harsh decision yes but after that question was answered the Major made no further use of human agents since he knew they’d be totally useless against Hellsing in light of it’s willingness destroy any human pawns he threw at them.

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