Stephen: Bobby!

Bobby: Yep.

Stephen: You’re dead!

Bobby: Right again.

I gotta say, this isn’t what I expected death to be like. Although, as a Unitarian, I didn’t have any set expectations in the first place, and would have been prepared to accept the afterlife as envisioned by any number of different faith trad–

Stephen: Bobby, I don’t care about your freaky pagan voodoo beliefs. Why are you in my head?

Bobby: Oh! Uh, I’m not really sure, but I do have a theory. It seems kind of like the link Mina had, which Professor Van Helsing used to exploitDracula. Only in reverse, of course.

Stephen: …

Bobby: How long have you been undead?

Stephen: I was turned in ’99.

Bobby: You’ve been a vampire for nine years and you’ve never read Dracula?

Stephen: I don’t like books, okay?