Integra: Put that trash away. How did you get it?
Heinkel (thinking): I’m worried about Yumiko…normally she’s so calm and passive.
Yumie is supposed to be the aggressive one…I suppose that doesn’t mean Yumiko can’t be more assertive.
Alucard: Trash? Master, this is a page from the novel with which Agent Paper attacked.
Yumiko: How dare you call Sumiregawa-sama’s work “trash”!
Heinkel (thinking): Still — that is not normal!
Posts from February 2006
War of the Words 44/120
Integra: Whether or not this is Wells’ objective, there is no way that he can succeed. Time travel is logically impossible.
Still, if he has mechanical abilities, he may have created something else dangerous.
Wells: They’re close. I thought the Morlocks would’ve bought me more time than that.
Integra: …Alucard, are you listening?
Book: “The first lips encoutnered as soft as steam freshly risen from waters hot, with the heat of…”
Shoujocard: Comfort Food
Shoujocard: Come on! Come on! hurry!
Regenerate your legs and attack me! C’mon!
Luke: Y–you’re a monster!
Shoujocard: …*sniff*
I see! *sob* You’re just like all the other boys!
It’s because I’m fat, isn’t it? Well, fine! I don’t care any more! I’m just going to eat and eat until I feel happy again!
[CHOMP]
Hey, what do you know…I feel better already.
War of the Words 43/120
Nenene: We have to protect Sumiregawa-sensei!
Heinkel (thinking): Also, we got a call.
Anderson (flashback): Something is up in London. Since you’re here, see if you c an find Hellsing.
Seras: What else could Wells be doing, do you think?
Integra: Again — we don’t have time to fight with you…
Yomiko: Time! That’s it!
Integra: That’s what?
Yomiko: Wells is building a time machine!
War of the Words 42/120
To save time the following strip will be presented in stick-figure vision.
[BANG BANG BANG]
Nenene: {Yipe!}
Yumiko: {Hi!}
Nenene: {How did we not notice you following us?}
War of the Words 41/120
Yomiko’s reflexes are such that she can intercept a bullet after it’s been fired. (You can see why she was a match for Alucard.)
Integra: Is that all that evil-Wells can do, then? Make Morlocks?
Yomiko: Trust me…
With an I-jin, that’s never “all it can do”–
[BANG]
Yomiko: For example, it seems he can also give the Morlocks guns.
War of the Words 40/120
Seras: “Morlock”?
Yomiko: They’re from The Time Machine — one of the future forms of man. There are two: the sweet, angelic “Eloi” and the brutish Morlocks.
It’s implied that this is the future of the class system. The rich evolve into the Eloi, and the poor…
Seras: Didn’t you say Wells was a socialist?
You’d think he would right something where the rich get screwe….
Integra: The Eloi are illiterate idiots. And the Morlocks eat them.
Seras: D’oh.
War of the Words 39/120
Yomiko: These aren’t I-jin. They’re probably created by the I-jin Wells.
Integra: How would this make sense as an ability for Wells?
Nenene: {What do we know about Wells?}
Integra: He was a socialist…in the Fabian Society…
Nenene: {Wrote War of the Worlds, but these aren’t Martians.}
Integra: Teacher, essayist, father of miniature war gaming…
Nenene: {And The Invisible Man, but they aren’t invisible.
— that’s it! They’re Morlocks!}
Helena’s Reviews: The Historian
Maddie came up with this joke after we’d both read The Historian.
Integra (thinking): I’ll just address this to Sir Penwood, and…hello, what’s this?
It feels old…and all of the pages are blank. There’s something in the middle?
[Book: DRACULYA]
Integra: Alucard!
Alucard: Oh, hey, you found one! I keep losing those things…
Helena: Go read The Historian, by Elizabeth Kostova. It’s a richly detailed, lovely, and worthwhile book.
War of the Words 38/120
Seras: What are these things?
[THUMP]
Pip: How should I know? I’m not the monster expert!
[BANG]
Seras: Well, they’re not ghouls!
Alucard: Very astute, Police Girl. Duck.
[BANG]