Integra: Alucard? Get them.
Alucard: Yes, Master.
Integra: I don’t have time for this. Just hold on to them.
Alucard: Will do.
Integra: And let’s bring everybody inside…because it’s bloody freezing out here.
Posts from January 2006
Shine or Die 23/120
Walter: {Sumiregawa-sama, it is an honor to meat you. Please excuse my poor Japanese. I am your biggest fan.}
Nenene: Arigato, Walter-san.
Yomiko: {I beg to differ, sir. I am Sensei’s biggest fan.}
Yumiko: No!
Sumiregawa-sama’s biggest fan is me!
Heinkel: [SLAP]
Liquid Ice
This only works if you’ve seen the contemporary LiquidIce commercials. (Which, by the way, are really flippin’ annoying.)
Pip: Hey, vampires can drink liquids, right?
Seras: Right…
Pip: Well, try this. I want you to settle something.
So…is it liquid?
Seras: I thought it was ice.
Pip: Yeah, you’re probably right. It’s ice.
Seras: No, wait, you were right at first. It’s liquid.
Pip: You’re right. It’s ice.
Seras: Captain, don’t worry. You’re right. It’s liquid.
Pip: No, you’re right.
Seras: You’re right.
Pip: You’re right.
Walter: Actually, the lab tests that Hellsing had done have conclusively proven that these are in fact part liquid, but in no way ice.
Seras: Oh.
Pip: Er…why was Hellsing running tests on something like this?
Integra: Don’t question me, servant. This is clearly a liquid.
Alucard: With all due respect, Master, this is ice.
Walter: It’s a long story.
Shine or Die 22/120
Introductions are made all around.
Integra: Sir Integral Wingates Hellsing, director of the organization Hellsing. And our chief weapon, the vampire Alucard.
Yomiko: Yomiko Readman, alias The Paper, agent of the British Library Special Ops division. {Introductions. She’s the leader; he’s the vampire.}
Walter: Walter Dornez. Hellsing agent (retired), butler, avid reader. And of course, this is Sumiregawa Nenene.
Shine or Die 21/120
Yomiko: Are you Sir Integral?
Integra: I am.
Yomiko: Joker sent you my file?
Integra: No; you were cited in the file on the mission.
Yomiko: How did you recognize me, then?
Integra: You were beating up my vampire with the contents of a filing cabinet. If you’re not “The Paper”, I’ll eat my scarf.
Shine or Die 20/120
Integra: Alucard! Agent Paper! Stop!
Shine or Die 19/120
Integra: Vampires!
You can’t leave them alone for a minute.
They’re always getting into some scrape or another…
Shine or Die 18/120
Integra: Yes, sir…understood. I’ll take care of it.
Alucard! Come here. There’s a job to do, and it needs your “expertise.”
Alucard (telepathy): Sorry, Master. I can’t.
Integra: And why not?
Alucard: I’m a little busy at the moment…
Shine or Die 17/120
[crinkling sounds of pwnage]
Shine or Die 16/120
Alucard: Trespassing on the premises of Hellsing is forbidden. Depart.
Yomiko: {I wish Joker would tell me about these things! Sensei, may I borrow a book?}
{I’m sorry about this…}
Nenene: {Don’t worry. As long as we get out of this in one piece, the book doesn’t have to.}