Apparently our last song from “The Lion King” struck a chord with several readers: three of them requested this next one. So, by popular demand, I give you the Major doing his rendition of “Be Prepared”!

[Major]
I never thought cheap vampires essential
They’re crude, and unspeakably plain
But their effect could be simply torrential
If allied to my vision and brain…

I know that your real attention
Is on obtaining eternal life
But while you are here, I should mention
It will not come without a price

It’s clear from your vacant expressions
You’re not sure what I’m driving towards…
There’s something I want, gentlemen, and:
I like war — I like war — I love war!

So prepare for a conflict that’s like hell
Be prepared with your troops and your ghouls
My bloody new era
Is fast drawing nearer

[Soldier]
And where do we feature?

[Major]
Just listen to Major!

I know it sounds sordid
But you’ll be rewarded
When at last I am given my war!
Let’s remind the world how to be scared
Be prepared!

[Soldier]
Yeah, be prepared!
Heh, we’ll be prepared…
For what!

[Major]
For the rise of a krieg!

[Soldier]
Who? Is that your name?

[Major]
No, you fool, it’s in German…
it means “war.”

[Soldier]
Great idea! We’re gonna win!
(We’ll win, we’ll win, la lala lala la…!)

[Major]
Idiots! I don’t care who wins!

[Soldier]
Hey, but you said, uh…

[Major]
I just want war!
Fight with me, and you’ll never grow older again!

[Soldier]
YEAH!! Krieg! Krieg! Krieg! Krieg!

It’s great that we’ll soon be immortal
Massacring and eating our fill

[Major]
Machine guns and tanks make me chortle
Retreats, bayonets — love it all!
The future is littered with prizes
And though we must suffer defeat
The point that I must emphasize is
It’s still more delightful than peace!

So prepare for the war of the century
With a thousand vampires and more!

Meticulous planning,
tenacity spanning
decades of rebuilding
our army will now bring

A war stretching limits of iron, wind, fire,
that will burn the world to the ground!
Yes, my teeth and ambitions are bared
Be prepared!

[Soldiers]
Yes, our teeth and ambitions are bared
Be prepared!