The Eagle of Hermes

The Eagle of Hermes published on No Comments on The Eagle of Hermes

Stephen Colbert is a vampire. The Hellsing Organization is after him. Jon Stewart really wishes he’d stayed home today. The Eagle of Hermes opens nine years after the climactic battle of Hellsing, and five minutes before The Colbert Report‘s tragic demise of Bobby the stage manager. It also takes place in the same universe as… Continue reading The Eagle of Hermes

Chapter 1 Page 04

Chapter 1 Page 04 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 04

Vintage correspondents ahoy. (The news report they’re watching is the same as the one in this strip.) New York, 1999. News: We’re getting no communication from inside the White House. Whereabouts of the Vice President remain unknown. At this time, members of the press are being barred from the scene. We’re going to play for… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 04

Chapter 1 Page 05

Chapter 1 Page 05 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 05

Jon: I just got word from the network. We’re not doing a show tonight. Rest of the week’s off too. Go home. Be with your families. Stephen: They can’t go. Jon: What are you talking about? Stephen: Exactly what I said. It’s not safe to leave here. The vampires will get you.

Chapter 1 Page 06

Chapter 1 Page 06 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 06

Back in ’08. Ring tone: It’s raining men! Hallelujah, it’s raining men! Hey, hey! Jon: Stephen? Make it quick. I’m on my way out. Stephen: Jon, they found me! Jon: What? Stephen: The Vatican. Section XIII. They’ve sent somebody over. And, Jon…I… Stephen: Ikindofatebobby. Jon: You WHAT?! Stephen: I didn’t mean to! He just looked… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 06

Chapter 1 Page 07

Chapter 1 Page 07 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 07

Poor Stephen is so much less powerful than Iscariot thinks he is. The Vatican is thinking “expertly guarded vampire stronghold with hordes of loyal mesmerized followers”, when in fact Stephen barely knows how to use his powers, and his only defense is Jon plus basic-cable security. [BANG BANG] Stephen: I’m not here! Sister Kim: Funny…that’s… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 07

Chapter 1 Page 08

Chapter 1 Page 08 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 08

Familiar figures in that fourth panel. After the attacks of ’99, the world’s vampire-hunting organizations couldn’t exactly remain secret – although they still try to be as secretive as they can. [CRUNCH] [KRACK SLAM THUD] Jon (thinking): I’m an idiot. I’m an idiot! This was bound to happen eventually. It’s not like he’s some kind… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 08

Chapter 1 Page 10

Chapter 1 Page 10 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 10

Stephen: HISSSS… Stephen: …Jon? Jon: Let her go, Stephen. Stephen: Are you crazy? She tried to kill me! Jon: Stephen, she’s a nun! Stephen: Yes, Jon. She’s with the Vatican’s Section XIII. I told you about them! See that dagger in front of you? Jon: Is that — stuck in the floor? Stephen: Not only… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 10

Chapter 1 Page 11

Chapter 1 Page 11 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 11

Other trinkets in that drawer include the things Stephen eagerly prepared for Papa Bear’s visit in the 200th episode (January 17, 2007). Jon: There, see? It’s gone. Is that better? Stephen: What do you mean, “better”? Once ninja-nun-girl wakes up and gets out of here, I’m done for! Unless you want to keep her tied… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 11

Chapter 1 Page 12

Chapter 1 Page 12 published on No Comments on Chapter 1 Page 12

Yeah, I know the bandages aren’t obeying any known laws of physics. Heinkel, like Anderson, is fourth-dimensional. Heinkel: Stand aside, human. You don’t want to ruin your nice suit. Stephen: JON!! Jon: H-hey! Listen, sir…uh, ma’am?…it’s not what you think! Don’t shoot! Can’t we talk about this? Heinkel: …I see. You’re under his thrall. DOn’t… Continue reading Chapter 1 Page 12