I wrote Integral’s rant about Van Helsing right after seeing it. Gabriel Van Helsing (they changed his name from Abraham) was working for a secret Catholic organization with the job of protecting the world from heathens and monsters. They didn’t say “Iscariot,” but I think we could all figure it out. Note from The Future:… Continue reading Integra versus Van Helsing
Alucard: A fangirl who pairs me with herself. Integra: It’s the next logical step. After all, most of them have remarked on what they think is sex appeal in you. Alucard: You mean you don’t think I have sex appeal? Integra: Not only that, I think they’re cracked in the head for coming up with… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 29/107
Meet Inness, Megan, and Tama the Alucard fangirls – all of whom ship Alucard with themselves ^_~ Integra: In any case, this is an isolated incident. Fangirl: No, it isn’t. [EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!] [EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!] [EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!] Integra: Isn’t it? How many such fangirls can there be? Fangirl: Alucard is so incredibly sexy and tall and dark and red… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 30/107
That’s Kalie the Integra fangirl; she founded the Hellsing guild on Neopets. Fangirl (background): the way he acts towards Integra is so cute. As a vampire he kicks major *** and could take the whole Vatican down if he pleased. [EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!] Integra (thinking): Have to get out of range… Fangirl 1: Cool Integra pose! Fangirl… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 32/107
Walter can figure out what’s going on by the fact that Jan McNeville the Walter fangirl has just knocked him over ^_~ Walter: I don’t mean to interrupt, but… [EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!] Fangirl: Walter’s so spiffy and neat and Walter’s British so British God save the Queen makes tea and the WIRES! Yes, the wires, Walter has… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 36/107
How do Enrico fangirls like Sarah “EEE ISCARIOT ^^” Dempster get these ideas about him? Enrico: I’d never thought I’d see the day… but here it is: all the major members of Hellsing are fallen at my feet. [EEEEEEEEEEEE!!] Fangirl: YEYMAXWELL! Maxwell is so cool! HE likes having fun! He’s the best Catholic in the world! No… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 37/107
[EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!] We interrupt this scene to bring you an update on the situation at the door: Pip: So, you’re the bloke Iscariot sent to pick up their boss? Alexander: Ay… that I am. Now that the suspense has been properly raised, we return to the action upstairs!
Fan 1: And, if he wasn’t from the Vatican and she wasn’t Protestant… IxM Fan 2: IxM only if they were seriously drunk. Integra: Alucard… off. Alucard: Why, Master, you mean you aren’t enjoying this?
Finally another Walter fangirl – this time, Shadow-chan. Integra: See? Some fans think I’m appealing. Alucard: Ah, so you do care about that? Fangirls: Gratuitous chibi moments, yay! Fangirl: Walter is SO awesome! How could he not be awesome? He uses wires as a weapon! And he dresses so spiffy! He’s is so great! And… Continue reading Return of the Fangirls 45/107
Seras: Wait a minute. Master doesn’t scare you but you’re terrified of Anderson? Fanboy: Well, let me explain: The difference between Alucard and Anderson is like the difference between a well-trained doberman and a rabid rottweiler without anything holding him back at all. Seras: I guess I could see it that way. Integra: I wouldn’t… Continue reading When Fangirls Attack 46/107