A quick’n’dirty cast list. Might get pictures later. We’ll see.
Stephen Colbert: None has ever caught him yet, for Stephen, he is master.
Bobby the Stage Manager: Just looked so delicious.
Jon Stewart: Colossal waste of Emmy prestige.
Heinkel Wolfe: Makes “Father Maccabee” sound like “kid.”
Seras Victoria: World’s most powerful vampire.
Integra Hellsing: They say she taught Chuck Norris the roundhouse kick.
Miranda: Will not allow herself to be intimidated.
Now I shall here begin
For to teach thee a ready way
Or else little shall thou win
Take good heed what I do say
“This way works. Pay attention to what I’m going to say, or you’ll muck it up.”
Divide thou Phoebus in many parts
With his beams that be so bright
And this with nature him convert
The which is mirror of all light
Phoebus = Phoebus Apollo = The sun. Sunlight is required.
“…the which is mirror of all light” – Darkness. Illuminate the whole room with sunlight, with no darkness there at all. Presumably with mirrors.
This Phoebus hath full many a name
Which that is full hard to know
And but thou take the very same
The philosophers stone ye shall not know
Here it gets allegorical/metaphorical.
All the names of a specific deity (or spirit, or entity, or… oh, you know what I mean!) can be hard to track down. Some are forgotten. But the INTENT is there, and that’s important as well; if you earnestly believe that you have uncovered all the various names – and thus also all the aspects of said entity, then your results should be as you want; likewise, here it is warning you to keep your mind on what all the aspects and properties of the Philosopher’s Stone are.
Therefore I counsel ere ye begin
Know it well what it should be
And that is thick make it thin
For then it shall full well like thee
“Refine your terminology. Make it simple and concise. If you are muttering a mantra of the qualities to yourself, you want a short version, not one that takes ten minutes. If the final conversion takes thirty seconds, you want a mantra that finishes within that time.”
Now understand what I mean
And take good heed thereto
Our work else shall little be seen
And turn thee to much woe
“Assuming you have completed all the prerequisites for this course, these instructions should be clear…”
As I have said this our lore
Many a name I wish he hath
Some behind and some before
As philosophers doth him give
“This has had many names, and will have many more.” (Seriously. Look up Paracelsus’ version of the Philosopher’s Stone, and then look at the descriptions of the Apocryphal modern Red Mercury. Similar much?) “But there are no better names as yet for what we do.”
In the sea without lees
Standeth the bird of Hermes
Eating his wings variable
And maketh himself yet full stable
And now we get to the meat of it… ready for this? The imagery has multiple layers in places and requires some thought to keep straight in your head.
The Sea without Lees: A Philosopher’s Egg. A primitive piece of glassware for certain reactions, which later evolved into the round-bottomed flask. You sealed the top by blowing molten glass over the hole, in the case of this particular action, when the fumes had filled the flask and were pouring out of it. It has no “lees”, no areas of shelter within it, and the contents would be mostly (if not all) fluid.
The Bird of Hermes: in this case, multi-layered imagery. It’s in an Egg, so a bird is the obvious metaphor for the reactants. Secondly, it also can be used to refer to the movements of the vapours within the flask; forming wing-like shapes as it heats.
Finally, there’s the important info: Hermes = Mercury. Mercury (Quicksilver) is well known as an important component of the Philosopher’s stone. Also to be noted: Alchemy was sometimes called “The Art of Hermes”.
Eating his wings, etc.: After a certain amount of time, the mercury vapour condenses and reacts fully, and is no longer dangerous. The reaction consumes itself and becomes stable.
When all his feathers be from him gone
He standeth still here as a stone
Here is now both white and red
And all so the stone to quicken the dead
All and some without fable
Both hard and soft and malleable
When the reaction is complete, the Philosopher’s Stone stands there in the middle, among a little ash from combusted components. The stone is traditionally bright red.
“Quicken the dead”… more multi-level imagery. The base metals (Iron, Tin, Lead) were considered “Dead” in essence by the thought at the time that this would have been written. Gold and Silver were “Living” metals, and Copper was considered very close- they warmed easily to the touch, and were very malleable. So the Stone, by turning base metals into Gold or Silver (depending on the quality of the work… but that’s a lecture for another day!) “quickened the dead”.
But then there’s the OTHER aspect of the Philosopher’s Stone. It provided eternal life, a certain amount of eternal youth, and immunity to all diseases. Theoretically, if used correctly, it could be used to restore life to the dead.
Understand now well and right
And thank you God of this sight
“Got that? Good! Thank you and goodnight!” (essentially.)
Now then… a little more background and understanding. Alchemy was (and is) more than just “Get rich quick”, as it has been broken down to. It’s a spiritual-philosophical discipline – a kind of Zen Chemistry if you like. The REAL Philosopher’s stone is not the red lump (or powder) that you end up with. It’s in the soul, in the spirit, in the heart. The processes are as much metaphorical for the journey of the soul towards enlightenment as they are about boiling mercury with sulphur and phosphorous. It is once you are enlightened – once you have attained a state by which you can understand the ways and mind of God – that eternal life is yours, that you get the wealth you desire (the gold of the spirit – knowledge) and you become unchanged by any disease (because you know it is only a transitory and unimportant thing of the flesh).
Monotheistic religion brought Alchemy to the fore, in a way; if there is one God, and he made everything, and leaves it running – then there must be rules that all things follow. The Philosopher’s Stone is, if you like, the first ever Hacking/Modding attempt, only on a very large scale.
So, what does this mean for Hellsing?
Alucard, who we all KNOW fine well is Vlad Tepes, Dracula. (He has had many names in the past, and will have many more…) Alucard, who is dressed all in scarlet – like the stone. Alucard, who grants life eternal – like the stone. Alucard, who grants immunity to all diseases, who brings knowledge, and whatever other powers you might want to name. He is the weapon of the Hellsing family; he is the fount of their power/wealth. He IS the stone in the traditional sense, the original sense.
On an interesting tangent, Alucard is a Vampire. Vampires, in modern pseudo-mythology are creatures of Lilith – the Sumero-Hebraic deity/demon. In Hebrew, Her name is written Liloth. The Italics are important, and the name comes to be broken down as “(feminine form) Spirits of the Air”, or “Aerial Spirits”. And we have had Aerial Spirits of Mercury already…
Finally, go and look at the illustrated version of the manuscript. And look at the picture that is captioned with the quote that comes in Alucard’s coffin.
To fully appreciate Hellsing, you need a solid grounding in vampires and related myths. Start with Dracula. But Stoker drew ideas from earlier books, and Hellsing‘s range of sources goes beyond that.
Fortunately, most of them are old enough to be out-of-copyright.
Dracula by Bram Stoker
The classic novel; Hellsing is a direct sequel to its events. Get this in, if nothing else. Just don’t believe the ending.
Dracula’s Guest, by Bram Stoker
A short story, said by Florence Stoker to be an excised first chapter of Dracula, although scholars have since cast serious doubt on this. (Note that it’s in a very different style.) Still, it’s clear that Hirano’s seen it.
Carmilla, by J. Sheridan LeFanu
One of Stoker’s direct inspirations. Read this and you’ll be able to sort out the confused allusions in Hellsing Order 09: Red Rose Vertigo – even though the translators couldn’t.
The Vampyre, by John Polidori
The original vampire story, spawned from the same brainstorming session as Frankenstein. Featuring Lord Ruthven.
Varney the Vampire, or, The Feast of Blood by James Malcom Rymer
An 1845 penny dreadful – that is, a cheap horror publication released serially, sort of the predecessor of pulp horror comics (or soap operas). A rousing read, and popular enough that it kept going for 237 chapters.
Other Useful Texts
The Ripley Scroll
An alchemical text, lines from which are found on Alucard’s coffin. (“The bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.”)
- Text & illustrations at The Alchemy Web Site
- Information at the RCPE
- Text & extended analysis at Shine
The song that Rip Van Winkle sings aboard the H.M.S. Eagle approaching London.
“Lenore” by Gottfried August Bürger
A poem which is quoted in Dracula (“Denn die Todten reiten Schnell” – “For the dead travel fast”).
Just so you know where to look for what screenshots and which scans, here’s a brief rundown of the contents of the tankōbon and DVDs.
American DVD Release (Geneon)
Every DVD contains a collection of concept art, and some trailers for other Geneon (then Pioneer) releases – plus of course the original Japanese audio, the English dub, and optional English subtitles.
Vol. 1 – Impure Souls
Order 01: The Undead
Integra introduced; Alucard introduced; Hellsing introduced; Seras runs away from ghouls; Seras captured by vampire priest, saved by Alucard; Seras becomes a vampire; Seras to join Hellsing
Order 02: Club M
Seras hesitates to shoot vampire attacking Kim; Hellsing given exposition; Leif and Jessica drive around and shoot people; Alucard releases to level five and creates illusions; Walter introduced; Seras gets used to living with Hellsing; Seras shoots Jessica
Order 03: Sword Dancer
Boarding-school young adults turn vampire; Alex comes to England to deal with them; Integra makes a joke; Captain Gareth killed; Seras stabbed by Alex; Alex and Alucard fight until Integra interrupts
- Psalm of the Darkness (music video/trailer/thing)
- Creditless opening
- Action figure info
Vol. 2 – Blood Brothers
Order 04: Innocent as a Human
Seras refuses to drink blood; new captain introduced; footage of Hellsing makes it onto the Internet; Seras plays detective, meets Harry Anders; Kim reports on Hellsing’s activities on TV; Kim, captain, and vampire-film makers tracked down; Kim’s blood drunk
Order 05: Brotherhood
Harkonnen Cannon, Jackal introduced; Valentine brothers hang out with scantily clad women in eerie bars; Valentine brothers attack Hellsing mansion; Knights of the Round Table introduced, rag on Integra; Integra out-awesomes them all
Order 06: Dead Zone
Luke challenges Alucard; Aluchard releases to level one, starts shapechanging; Luke gets whipped; Jan brings in ghoul army, smokes Integra’s cigars; Walter holds Jan off while Seras battles ghoul army, including former Hellsing soldiers; Integra shoots Jan
- Staff interview
- Creditless ending v.1
Vol. 3 – Search and Destroy
Order 07: Duel
Mess from 05 and 06 is cleaned up; Integra hears reports on troop loss, meets with Enrico Maxwell in museum; Seras and others chase vampire into a subway; Alex kills vampire, several Hellsing soldiers; more information on FREAK chips given; Alex attacks Seras, who is saved by Alucard; Alucard beats Alex again; Integra pwns Enrico
Order 08: Kill House
Seras introduces new troops to the idea of vampires; Seras goes back to old apartment, encounters Harry Anders, taken to see Helena; Helena waxes philosophic; Alucard messes with Integra’s dreams
Order 09: Red Rose Vertigo
Regular Army attempts
to do Hellsing’s job, fails miserably; Alucard distracted by first appearance of Incognito; baobhan sith shows up, hypnotizes Walter, unnerves Seras, poses as Integra’s sister; Incognito gains small army, inducts Paul Wilson in odd rose-petal scene; baobhan sith undresses, bites Integra; Alucard kills her; Integra stabs self
- Japanese cover art
- Creditless ending v.2
Vol. 4 – Eternal Damnation
Order 10: Master of Monster
Integra goes through surgery, has dream-flashback: Young Integra takes lessons from father, watches father die, chased by Uncle Richard & minions, finds Alucard in basement, awakes Alucard, kills uncle; Seras realizes Integra is Alucard’s master, their relationship is special; Alucard waits until Integra’s awake to leave
Order 11: Transcend Force
Attempt to trap the bad guys leads into counter-trap; Seras goes to find Helena, finds her eaten; Helena pwns Incognito, burns down own house; Integra does cool knight-ceremony thing; traitor in the Round Table sends British military to Tower of London to attack Hellsing; Helena gives Seras information; Seras runs to save day
Order 12: Total Destruction Counter-trap springs into full force; Ferguson killed; Seras shows up, shoots things, meets Paul Wilson; Alucard gets to Incognito, battles; Alucard shot to pieces with own bullets
Order 13: Hellfire
Integra and Walter arrive via helicopter chase; Walter, in helicopter, shot down; Integra, still recovering from surgery, captured, used in demon-summoning ritual; Alucard’s full power released; big scary battle;
Dracula Alucard wins; Integra held in prison pending investigation, offered vampirism by Alucard; cliffhanger left
- Magazine ad art
- Weapons art
- Creditless ending v.3
American Manga Release (Dark Horse)
01 – Vampire Hunter (Hellsing introduced; Seras vampirized)
02 – Master of Monster (Flashback to Integra finding Alucard at age 13)
03 – Murder Club (Leif and Jessica dealt with; idea of artificial vampires surfaces)
04 – Sword Dancer 1
05 – Sword Dancer 2
06 – Sword Dancer 3 (Long battle between Alucard and Alex)
Bonus story: Crossfire (Heinkel and Yumiko/Yumie introduced, kick butt)
01 – Dead Zone 1
02 – Dead Zone 2
03 – Dead Zone 3
04 – Dead Zone 4 (Valentine Brothers attack; word “millennium” surfaces)
05 – Balance of Power 1 (Wild Geese introduced)
06 – Balance of Power 2 (Enrico Maxwell introduced; intelligence points to South America as source of Millennium project)
Bonus story: Crossfire 2 (Heinkel and Yumiko/Yumie kick further butt)
The Afterword, A Merry Manga: Luke’s and Jan’s Life’s A Paper Balloon Beautiful People Corner (don’t ask)
01 – Balance of Power 3 (Walter and Alucard reminisce; Pip and Seras bicker; Pip, Seras, Alucard set off for S. America)
02 – Elevator Action 1
03 – Elevator Action 2
04 – Elevator Action 3
05 – Elevator Action 4
06 – Elevator Action 5 (In S. America: regular police sent against Alucard and Seras; they get killed; someone mildly useful, Tubalcain Alhambra a.k.a. The Dandy, sent to fight Alucard)
The Afterword, A Merry Manga: Luke’s and Jan’s Paper Snow Storm Of Humanity God Is In The TV
Bonus story: Crossfire 3 (Heinkel and Yumiko/Yumie do what they do best)
01 – Elevator Action 6 (Flashback: Integra gets advice from her father; The Dandy defeated)
02 – Age of Empire 1 (Enrico interrogates Vatican authority on the Vatican’s Millennium connections)
03 – Age of Empire 2 (Millennium discusses plans; Alucard, Seras, Pip plan to get out of Brazil)
04 – Age of Empire 3 (Higher-ranking Nazi officers than the Major show up, try to muscle him out; Major has them eaten)
05 – Call to Power (Alucard has dream-flashback to capture by Van Helsing; Schrödinger crashes special Round Table meeting with the Queen, delivers message from the Major)
06 – Ultima On Line (Major finishes message; Schrö shot; Hellsing given royal order to defeat Millennium)
07 – D 1 (Alex fights off Millennium agents tailing him, complains; Schrö snarks; Millennium advances on H.M.S. Eagle)
08 – D 2 (Rip takes over H.M.S. Eagle; Seras attempts to eat until ordered to drink some of Integra’s blood)
09 – D 3 (Rip finishes takeover; Major makes his famous “I Like War” speech; Operation Seelöwe – the advance on England – begins)
01 – Flash Point (Alucard has “Willis” dream)
02 – D 4 (Security Council sends regular troops to H.M.S. Eagle; Rip shoots them down)
03 – D 5 (Integra pwns Security Council folks; Alucard sent to H.M.S. Eagle on adapted one-seater jet)
04 – D 6 (Alucard approaches; “Samiel” monolog by Rip)
05 – D 7 (Alucard lands on H.M.S. Eagle; Rip has flashback, trembles)
06 – D 8 (Rip fights back; Alucard gets upper hand)
07 – D 9 (Alucard finishes off Rip; Millennium members salute her)
08 – Xanado (Attack begins; vampires invade Security Council, are pwned by Walter and Integra)
09 – Final Fantasy 1 (Major gives out orders, pep talk, “Destroy Everything” speech)
10 – Final Fantasy 2 (Things blow up; Sir Penwood stays in danger zone to issue orders; Integra and Penwood have “mutual respect” moment; other officers, inspired by Penwood, stay; Integra prepares to head home)
01 – Final Fantasy 3 (London attacked)
02 – Final Fantasy 4 (Penwood attacked, has flashback, dies; Walter encounters Captain, stays to fight him; Integra drives off)
03 – Final Fantasy 5 (Integra drives, chased; faces down tons of ghouls with sword; joined by Alex and bayonets)
04 – The Screamer (Iscariot forces give speech)
05 – Aubird Force (Enrico, in France, gets news of London burning; orders Iscariot forces into England; gets news of H.M.S. Eagle approaching)
06 – Gun Bullet (Integra pwns Iscariot characters; Seras fires on zeppelins with Harkonnen II)
07 – Balloon Fight (Pip and Seras take out zeppelins, much to Joleen’s dismay; Pip remenisces)
08 – Soldier of Fortune 1 (Pip has flashback; Joleen’s forces walk over minefield)
09 – Soldier of Fortune 2 (Joleen creates giant-self illusion; other soldiers panic, front troops annihilated; Seras sees through it)
10 – Soldier of Fortune 3 (Seras undoes illusion; Pip almost kisses Seras; Seras heads downstairs to replace first line of defense)
Use any of these buttons and banners to link to Shine.
by Aria the Insane
General Hellsing fanstuff, as it gets brought over from the old site.
- Ptah’s fic (AO3)
Offsite collection of the artist’s Hellsing fanfiction.
- Fanfic Recs (diigo)
Offsite list of fic bookmarks: Hellsing, crossovers, Dracula.
- You Know You Like Hellsing Too Much When…
A handy fan-compiled reference list.
- Hellsing Summaries
Episode-by-episode and chapter-by-chapter breakdowns.
- Vampire Literature
Public-domain texts and translations.
- Which Minor Hellsing Character Are You?
A character quiz for the non-protagonists among us.
And remember: The true fan can work Hellsing into everything.
An archive of polls that used to run on the main Shine website — most-recent first.
(Minus the ones like “Would you draw me a guest strip?”)
(This was running when Timothy’s first major storyline started, and during that time he shot from a distant third place up to first.)
You might also want banners to link back to Shine.
– Integra fansite
– Japanese fanart site
– Japanese fanart site
– The Hellsing Wiki
Hiranomoe Scans Bureau – Scanlations of all kinds of Hirano’s works.
- Hellsing Bloopers
When the series goes awry.
The anime-only characters form their own organization, and wreak havoc on the manga plot.
A Hellsing-based Macbeth parody.
Enrico’s back! As a vampire. Awkward.
- Elevator Action (Without the Elevator)
- Cross Fire
Short gag strips.
- A New Menace
Iscariot takes up Internet spam.
- What REALLY goes on at the Hellsing headquarters?
- Servant Loves Master
- Historical Hellsing