The super-top-secret templates behind most of the strips in the early years…
#1 – “Typical Pip”
Pip: [surprisingly deep remark]
Seras: Wow, Captain…that was surprisingly deep of you.
Pip: [continuation on subject with sexual innuendo]
Seras: It figures.
#2 – “Enrico and Integra”
Integra: [point of theological contention between Catholics & Protestants]
Enrico:
Integra: [well-crafted, intelligent rebuttal]
Enricl: Yes, but we don’t use vampires. So nyah.
#3 – “Pip and Seras”
[ANGST] [vampire] [monster] [young] [unloved] [too cute]
Pip: Do not angst, Seras. [reason to be happy]
Seras: You’re right, Pip. I feel better.
Pip: Oh good! Can we sleep together now?
Seras: [RAGE.]
[Doom Mallet]
[Repeat with new subject of angst]
#4 – “AxI”
Integra (thinking): [non-angry thought about Alucard]
[thought with the faintest suggestion of the merest hint of a very slight attraction to Alucard]
Alucard: [snarky comment]
Integra: [verbal abuse]
#5 – “Easy Storyline Template”
Seras: I have an idea!
[BOOM]
Ouch.
#6 – “Temporary AxI”
Integra/Alucard (thinking): ♥ / [prejudice] / [violent denial]
+ [Pick One]
– Alcohol
– Hypnotism
– Dream sequence
– Drugs
– Magic
– Magic of Christmas
– Aliens= [SMOOCH!]
#7 – “Young Enrico”
Enrico: When I was a kid…
[CUTE!]
[No punch line necessary]
#8 – “Reseda”
[cute cute]
[cute cat-type activity]
Reseda: Purrrr.
Walter, Pip, Seras, cat lovers in readership: Oh, how cute!
#9 – “Walter”
Walter: Tea?
Seras: Thank you!
Walter: [innocuous comment]
Seras: [mundane reply]
Walter: [cheerful response with possible double meaning relating to homosexuality]
Seras: …
Walter: More tea?
