Vampire: Aiiee! Wh-what are you?
Alucard: Merely a servant of the Hellsing Organization. I already know what you are — a pitiful pile of trash that…
Integra (thinking): Alucard!
Alucard: Um…just a moment.
Alucard (telepathy): Master, can it wait? I’m in the middle of a speech!
Integra (thinking): Look, just call Seras and send her up here.
Alucard (telepathy): Right away, Master. Police girl!
Seras (thinking): Yes, Master? What is it?
Alucard (telepathy): Go see Integra. She needs you.
Seras (thinking): Is she all right?
Alucard (telepathy): She didn’t say. Hop to it!
Seras (thinking): Yes, sir, Master!
Alucard: Well, now that my dramatic atmosphere has been completely ruined, I think I’ll just shoot you and get it over with.
[glug glug glug]
Integra (thinking): …
Integra: Dammit, A’kad, don’ DO that!
Alucard: Did I startle you, Master? I’m SO sorry.
Integra: I hope I didn’ upset y’r dignity too much when I called.
Alucard: Only completely.
The car swerved off the road; I was towering over the maggot vampire, in perfect form. He stuttered; I started a speech — and then had to break it off!
Alucard: I can’t imagine a greater affront to my dignity than–
Integra: Get me another cup a’ juice.
Alucard: Okay, one greater affront. But only one!