Walter (thinking): Bleh. It’s no big deal. I just have to keep Alucard from screwing up the time we have.
Alucard! Are you fooling around in Sir Hellsing’s office again?
Fangirl: ZOMG!!!! I absolutely love Alucard! He looks so pretty in the Dawn and in Hellsing he is so powerful! He is my hero! I love how he can go from psycho killer to philosopher in a matter of seconds!
Stephen: You have my very conditional attention.
Bobby: Well, for starters, I can tell when you’re being an idiot — that feels so good to say, you have no idea–
Stephen: Bobby —
Bobby: Sorry. Thing is, you’re not using your powers very effectively.
Stephen: …I sort of don’t have any. I mean, not dying, sure, and I can shapeshift just enough to hide the eyes and teeth, but that’s about it.
Bobby: And hypnotism!
Stephen: Like I told Jon, I don’t have–
Bobby: But you do! Maybe it’s subconscious, but I’m telling you, I can see this in your mind. You’ve been doing a kind of low-level hypnotism on your audience for years now.
Bobby: What, did you think they were listening for your cogent and reasoned analysis of the news?