World's second-most-popular Hellsing-related comic.
Narration: So Hellsing took possession of the Ripley Scroll. We still have it today.
Come to think of it…if the angel hadn’t taken it in the first place, it would still have been in the library when it was burned to the ground.
Integra: …Thanks.
Crowley: Don’t mention it.
Narration: Perhaps there was something ineffable about this after all.
[Limited release complete. To be continued…]
Narration: I’ll probably never know what was going through the angel’s mind in those next few moments. But at last he said:
Aziraphale: Donnie…I won’t allow the British Library to have the scroll.
Donnie: What–?
Aziraphale: But she can hold on to it. Is that an acceptable compromise?
Crowley: Look, Angel, I don’t see what’s so hard about this. Don’t you always claim that He finds a use for everything?
If you’re going to keep insisting that I’m playing into His hands — that even The Rebellion had a purpose — then how can you object to a vampire? It’s…that word you’re always using…
Donnie: Ineffable?
Crowley: That’s the one!
Aziraphale: I don’t always use it.
Crowley/Donnie: Oh, yes you do.
Pip: Look, boss, you can’t stop the story there! Finish it before getting to the moral. Did the scroll go back to the library?
Aziraphale: You used the scroll…? How long ago?
Alucard: Ninety years. I served her father before her, and his father before him.
Aziraphale: And I never heard…maybe this is His will after all…
But still…on a mission from God, and you don’t mind working with a vampire? They’re practically fallen!
Crowley: Ahem.
Aziraphale: You hush, dear.
Integra: But this part is superfluous. You’ve seen my point already, I’m sure.
Seras/Pip: …
Pip: You talked back to an angel.
Integra: Yes.
Seras: After spitting on a demon.
Integra: That’s the general idea, yes.
Aziraphale: The knowledge in that scroll is far too dangerous for the human race, Donnie. You’ll only get in trouble.
Donnie: And what if we don’t, Aziraphale? Can’t we at least be given the chance?
Aziraphale: It’s too risky–
Integra: Mr. Fell!…um, Aziraphale! Could you turn off your holy light for just a moment? Please?
Aziraphale: For a moment. Since you asked so politely.
Integra: Thank you. Alucard, rise.
Haven’t you recognized him yet, sir? He is The Bird of Hermes.
Aziraphale: Donnie–! I don’t want to take the scroll back by force, but I will!
Donnie: But Aziraphale, why? You feel it too, don’t you? The emotions of the books? So you know–! The scroll wants to go home!
And a happy New Year!
Donnie: He’s got me there. I won’t hurt the books.
Books are like people to me. They have thoughts and feelings, and their lives are just as valuable. Besides, it would be a senseless waste to use all the paper in this shop in a futile attempt to defeat an angel. After all, I can do it by moving only one text…
…the Ripley Scroll itself.