Scripted in part by the prolific Xuanwu, and dedicated to the late, great George Carlin.

(Yes, I do realize the incredible irony of bleeping this man, especially in his own tribute.)

Bob: Since when does my job description include “buying soup for the sick boss”?

Thien: Think of it as helping your girlfriend.

Bob: It’s nice to be back in civilization, but…this is ridiculous.

Thien: What, supermarkets? They’re convenient.

Bob: Mass-produced, mass-marketed food! Look at these labels!

“Hearty.” Right. With that much saturated fat? “Heart attacky” is more like it! This one says it’s “zesty.” And here’s “tangy.” Who uses words like that?

And this soup is chicken-flavored. You know what that means…

George Carlin: …no $@%ing chicken!

Bob: Exactly! God, I miss open-air markets.

Thien (thinking): Was that…? Nah, couldn’t be.