Pip: Gotta say, though… if you were a vampire you could suck my blood any day…
Wild Geese: Captain!
Pip: She’s – she’s a freak! All she did was flick me but my head’s spinnin’!
Sera: So, ah, like Walter said… I’m a vampire.
Seras: I knew they’d laugh at me… we should’ve had Master do this.
Walter: He probably would have just killed them all.
Pip: If, if, if you’re a vampire, then I’m bloody Frankenstein’s monster!! Hahahaha…
Seras: I don’t think I like him.
Walter: Captain Bernadette? By all means, then, go change his mind.
Seras: I think I will. Captain! C’mon up here. I challenge you to a fight. There’s only one rule: All I can do is flick my fingers.
After I posted this, Lorena pointed out that there are werecats in mythology. Jan McNeville discussed a type of cat demon (the aku-sambiki) in Japanese mythology which could take on human form – but retained its ears.
Erin: Now here’s a question I’ve gotten fair few times…
Erin: For those of you not that far in the Manga, these two are Rip and Schrödinger, two of the Millennium Nazis – chibified for convenience (and maximum cuteness).
Disclaimer: Real Nazis are never cute. That’s pretty obvious. This isn’t trying to offend anyone… except maybe Nazis.
Rip’s a vampire.
There’s been some confusion over her being a werewolf – Mr. Mitts explained this in all of its confusing detail, but I’ll just try to summarize.
There’s a German term, “Wehrwolf,” meaning “defense wolf.” It’s been long associated with irregular warfare in Germany. A division of Nazis in that business (they sniped, poisoned food stocks, poured sand in petrol tanks, etc.) preferred the spelling “Werwolf” – the equivalent of the English “werewolf” (“lycanthrope”).
Rip’s job is a descendant of the job of this division. Thus, Werwolf (“werewolf”) is her rank, but not her species.
Schrödinger’s also a Werwolf, but his species we’re not sure of.
Evidence suggests that he’s the male version of an old anime standard – the catgirl.
His name, after all, is that of Erwin Schrödinger, a quantum physicist most famous for his experiment involving a cat.
The upshot is that the cat in question can be 100% live and 100% dead at the same time. (Until you actually look at it. At that point reality is fixed and it becomes one or the other.)
Sounds fitting in this series, doesn’t it.
Besides, he acts like you’d expect a catboy to.
[Cameo by my cat, Tabitha.]
Erin: The problem with the catboy theory is that everything else in Hellsing has a literary or mythological basis. Lycanthropes have this. Catboys don’t. I think we’ll just have to wait for a final answer from Hiraino-san on this one.
Pip: You’re… a vampire?
Seras: Uh… yeah… something of the sort…
Wild Geese: HAHAHA AHAHAHAH HA AHAHA HAHAHA
Wild Geese: You must be barmy!
Pip: Everyone knows that vampires aren’t real.
Walter: Quite true – because “everyone” is kept deliberately in the dark. Meanwhile, the Hellsing Organization exterminates vampires behind the scenes.
Walter: This is our enemy… the vampire.
Much of the dialogue in this sequence is straight from the manga.
Integra: I need to know how they’ve reacted to the idea of hunting – and working with – vampires.
Walter: Ah, yes.
Walter: Vampires… ageless, immortal, blood-sucking monsters. Our purpose is to find those which harm humans and eradicate them. We carry garlic and holy water, drive wooden stakes into their hearts, and burn their corpses. Certain specially treated bullets will also do the job. For more details, refer to classic vampire literature. Any questions?
Wild Geese: …
Integra: You’ve given a high estimation of their skill and trustworthiness…
Walter: Well, they’re the best quality. Besides, we’re paying their debts.
Integra: And I’ll hear for myself how they handle themselves on missions when they return. If not from them, then from Seras and Alucard.
What I want to… what is it?
Walter: You realize you’ll be trusting the word of vampires over humans?
Integra: Do you object?
Walter: Not at all. Do continue.
Special Election Day filler cheesecake. (Source.) Drawn in response to one fanboy’s request “to see the females of Hellsing in a cheesy visit-to-the-beach episode.”
Integra: Now that Captain Bernadette and his men are off on two different cases…
… and Seras is supervising one while Alucard shadows the other, leaving the house empty except for us…
… the readers and I are desperately in need of a trip to the department of backstory.
Walter: Certainly, sir.