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The Pip Backstoryline 16/24

The Pip Backstoryline 16/24 published on No Comments on The Pip Backstoryline 16/24

Pip: So that means she has worries, insecurities, that sort of thing.

She’s better at hiding them than most people – better at dealing with them too, I’ll wager. But-

Seras: Idiot!


The Pip Backstoryline 14/24

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Seras: ….

Pip: What’s that?

Seras: It’s just… I… well… What’s she got that I haven’t?

Pip (thinking): Ouais!!


Pip: Long hair, glasses, dark skin, the last name Hellsing…


The Pip Backstoryline 13/24

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Although Pip is French, he would most likely think in English when in an anglophone area. However, writing his thoughts in his native language gives me a chance to practice my French.

The deep inner workings of Pip’s brain:

Pip (thinking): 1ement: Seras me demand si je m’intéresse à une autre femme donc c’est possible qu’elle soit jalouse. 2e: Seras est superbe. C’est une vampire, mais elle est superbe quand même. Donc, ce serait impressionnant si elle est jalouse. Donc la question est: comment puis-je la rendre plus jalouse?

[1st: Seras is asking me if I’m interested in another woman. Therefore, it’s possible that she’s jealous. 2nd: Seras is hot. A vampire, but hot all the same. Therefore, it would be impressive if she were jealous. So the question is: how can I make her more jealous?]

Laisser entendre que j’ai cet intérêt.

[It’s simple: hint that I’m interested.]

Pip: Mmmmaaaaaybe.

The Pip Backstoryline 12/24

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Pip: C’mon police girl, lighten up.

Seras: Don’t call me that.

Pip: How’d your report to the boss go?

Seras: About usual. And yours?

Pip: Oh, it was great. Halfway through the description of our tactics she asks why I didn’t do so-and-so instead – and she was dead right, that’s what I shoulda done.

Pip: It’s so refreshin’ ta have an intelligent boss for once. She’s a pretty amazin’ person.

Seras: You don’t… fancy her, do you?

Magically Delicious

Magically Delicious published on No Comments on Magically Delicious

I wrote this joke a long time ago, and it’s been waiting for Pip’s introduction ever since.

[rummage rummage]

Seras: Captain? What are you doing?

Pip: Raidin’ th’ cupboard. What’s it look like?

Seras: You can’t do that! This isn’t your house!

Pip: So take it outa my pay. We need breakfast down at the barracks. An’ nobody feels like cookin’.

Pip: Besides, why do you care? You don’t eat.

Seras: Sir Integral and Walter do!

Pip: Can you imagine Sir Integra eatin’ this?

Seras: Maybe it’s Walter’s.

Pip: Walter’s a nice guy. ‘E won’ mind.

Seras: Are you drunk?

Pip: Jus’ a lil’ hung over. C’mon, take pity on me an’ us poor hungry Wild Geese.

Seras: Pity? It’s your own fault!

Seras: Give it back-!

Pip: Whoa, there!

Pip: Help! She’s after me Lucky Charms!

Integra (thinking): I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know….

The Pip Backstoryline 11/24

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Later that evening:

Seras (thinking): I still say this cannon is a bloody pain in the neck… oh, no, that could be such a bad pun.

Pip: Hey there!

Pip: Have ya stopped hitting’ hostages yet?

Sera: Shut it, captain.

The Pip Backstoryline 10/24

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Integra: I take it that, since you’re here, since you’re here, the first mission is complete?

Alucard: Yes, the captain is on his way up to give his report now.

Integra: Dismissed, Walter.

Walter: Yes, sir.

Integra: How are they, Alucard?

Alucard: They are… worthy of being in Hellsing.

Integra: Excellent.

The Pip Backstoryline 9/24

The Pip Backstoryline 9/24 published on No Comments on The Pip Backstoryline 9/24

Integra: This doesn’t sound promising.

Walter: Don’t worry, that’s the worst of it. They’ve adjusted by now, at least to Seras: she’s technically a lower rank than the captain, but she’s been supervising their training.

Alucard: I showed her a bit of that earlier.

Walter: Delighted to hear it, Alucard.

Integra: You really must do something about this annoying habit of listening in on my conversations unannounced.

Alucard: Why, Master, I’d think you would be used to it by now…

The Pip Backstoryline 8/24

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Pip: So… you’re really a…

Alucard: Of course she is.

Alucard: It’s true that among us she’s the lowest of the low…

Alucard: …but she’s obviously a vampire.

Wild Geese: Gyaaaahhhh!!!

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