On his arm are Lynn and Crystal; on his head are Lan and Jennifer; in the air above him is Zafiel; on his back and cape are Liz, Kage, and Staci; under his cape are Cait and Jessie; and that’s not even the half of them . . .

Fan 1: Love Alucard! He’s the hottest guy in anime! Who cares if he’s dead! It just means he’ll never go away! He’s witty, he’s humorous, you can’t outsmart him, and he can piss off Integra without stopping for a breath (I wanna do that!) He should always be paired with Integra! ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS!

Fan 2: Want to be one of Alucard’s vampire girls, lol. Alucard is my Master! I wish I could join Hellsing so I could hang out with Alucard and kill ghouls!

Fan 3: Alucard is so cool. He’s got the most wonderful voice. And Alucard has beautiful vampire fangs which are nice and shiny and white. And he’s got the best hairdo which is reminiscent of the out-of-bed-look but better looking and cool and

Fan 4: Alucard is the coolest! And he’s a vampire, and he’s got guns, and he’s tough! And no one can beat Alucard! Alucard has fangs, so cool!!

Fan 5: Alucard always has a spare pair of yellow tinted glasses!

Fan 6: Alucard is so great and Alucard is so powerful and Alucard